Our friends and family have commented at what an absolute rock-star of a big brother Maddox has been since Marlow was born (And I totally agree). Preparing for Marlow’s arrival was very different from preparing for Maddox. We already had most of our “baby necessities” that we acquired when Maddox was born, so one of the main things we really tried to focus on was preparing Maddox. We talked a lot about Marlow and what would happen when she was born.
First, we shared our plan for what would happen when Mommy and Daddy went to the hospital. Until our first night in the hospital, Maddox had never spent the night away from us. So we worried this separation might be tough. To prepare, we discussed, almost daily, how Mommy and Daddy would go to the hospital and Maddox would go stay with Lolli, Poppi and aunt Kelsey. We talked in detail about how much fun he would have, where he would sleep, and when he would come see us. We also had him tell us what the plan was and what he wanted to do. I really think all the preparation and discussion made for his easy transition! He was amazing and never once seemed upset or unhappy about being away from us at all!
The second thing we really focused on was discussing with Maddox exactly what it will be like when we bring Marlow home. Very early on we started reading “new baby” books with Maddox. Our favorites were: I’m a Big Brother, The New Baby, My New Baby and Babies Don’t Eat Pizza. (Thanks for books Lolli!) The books were the best help for us. Reading them together really opened up the conversation for us to talk with Maddox. Some of the books are step by step bringing baby home, and others go through examples of what new babies can and can’t do.
Lastly, throughout the pregnancy we talked with Maddox about Marlow as a real baby, who was already part of our family. We really tried to include Marlow in all our conversations. When we were playing, we talked about how we will play with Marlow. We still do this. When we are building with blocks, we talk about how Marlow may knock our blocks down and how that’s what babies do sometimes. When we eat, we talk about what and how Marlow will eat. You name it, we try to talk to about it
So while it’s only been 4 weeks, Maddox has been a truly amazing big brother! He looks at her with great tenderness. He sings to her, and if she cries he offers comfort. We do everything we can to make him feel included and important when it comes to Marlow. He is our “big helper” and he loves doing jobs to help take care of his baby sister. I can’t predict how the future will be, and I’m sure there will be crazy days, but so far the transition of bringing Marlow home has been a very smooth one, and I credit really thorough preparation for that.